So, everyone is drunk. The basic breakdown to the evening is thus. I woke up, Gran had a stroke, I complained about the noise, the reasoning behind it was explained. "Your Gran is having a stroke." Much like I often do, or am I referring to something else?! Who knows, but I am not disturbed. We are all animals and sometimes, often, we die. So, I got a parcel from the lovely lass and it included a phone (so now I am mobile again - same number and all that), a letter that left nothing to the imagination and is document I imagine I will be studying at great length and with much exertion, plus, and this is ingenius and it shows she knows me so well so soon, a copy of 1969's June issue of Playboy. What a gift. The porn is miniscule but relevant, and I am loving the appreciation it gives me of the epoch. The adverts. I shan't attempt to describe them but, trust me, it is a gift worth having. The girl is a player. I want to be with her right now, but she is miles away. What is to be done? I know, I should catch a plane. She will wait, she will simmer and then, when the time is right, we shall be together. Nuff said.
In the days of rapid-right-handed-wrist-wobbling abstinence that I have been reveling in recently, it has become clear that my addiction was not to wanking but rather to pornography. I now believe that the physical ritual of masturbation and the blatant material of pornography combine to create an experience which is easily repeatable and soon becomes firmly established in your head as a source of joy. Like the rolling and then smoking of a spliff, like the pound coin being pushed into the slot and then the pretty colours, like the preparation and then hit of the Brown Lady. All inducive to a state of addiction. I actually attempted to have a wank last night. One of my customers had heard that I was thinking of returning to a 'proper' job in the city and so, for some reason and showing an alarming intuition into only recently cremated habits, gave me two DVD of porn filth as a leaving present. Purely for reasons of research, I popped one on last night and settled back, thi