5 Mar 2003
Sami, Sami, Sami, Constable Sami L’Actose. He had met me at the airport when I landed from Ecuador. I guessed that the authorities over there had informed their equals in Paris that Bruce Campbell was on his way. Sami and his squad had been sent to meet and great me and warn me to behave. I saw them a mile off as I sauntered towards the exit where they were waiting. Sami was clearly uncomfortable with this detail and he was shuffling his feet and twirling his dark moustache in impatience. He told me afterwards that the day before he had unknowingly arrested the Mayor’s daughter for soliciting and this was his penance. I stopped in front of him so he could say his piece, which he did and then I said mine. It could have been the start of a bad relationship but it was immediately clear that we were going to get on. Which we did. Hence his nearly unconscious prostrate body on the cushions beside me right now. Great minds think alike and ours had led us to the SUB. I started dreaming of rolling green fields and daisies and blue tits singing in ancient oak trees.
I gave myself a mental kick in the arse. This was no time to be gouching out. There were vampires about, who knows where, and I had undertaken to sort a few of them out at the very least. My head stopped lolling on my chest, I wiped the drool from the corner of my mouth and opened my eyes. Sami had his face on the floor by my feet. I bent down and softly shook him out of his stupor. It took a moment or two but he grabbed his wits and sat up and leaned close.